Can I handle it?

By Lydia Laythe Staff Writer laythe16@up.edu

When I first arrived to Portland and carried my belongings to my room, which were reduced to two large boxes and an extremely heavy suitcase, I was relieved to finally settle down in one spot. Born in Eugene, I moved to Pennsylvania when I was a baby. So, after an eight hour plane trip and countless family reunions, I was ready to be unpacked for good.

Before my parents left me for my first night alone, they had to ask a few last minute questions: Would I remember to pick up my room, because this was "shared living space" now? Yes, I would remember that.

Would I promise not to date any guys until I had my PhD? ...Sure, Dad.

I knew exactly how it would go: extremely enthusiastic speaker, 100 uncomfortable kids, 100 kids who are too comfortable and several activities that are designed to "build community," which actually means "make everyone feel as awkward as possible."

I found myself joking to the people around me about how awkward I felt, thinking that maybe by talking about it I could make it go away. In some ways it worked. I got to laugh with people and make them feel a little more comfortable.

That night, as I settled into my lofted bed that still smelled like its plastic wrapping, my mind began to fill with worries. Would I get completely lost on my first day to class, or have people to sit with at lunch?

Complete freedom and independence sounded so nice from the comforts of my own bed back in little Edinboro, Pennsylvania. Now I was beginning to worry. Could I handle it?

Yes, I was a little intimidated by finding my classes, handling the academics and maneuvering through the craziness of The Commons at lunch time, but thousands of people have survived college so far. If they could do it, so could I.

Before he left, my dad gave me some good advice: no one knows everything right away. No one walks onto a new campus knowing everything about it, so ask questions.

I did ask questions. Who? What? When? Where? But the most important question I asked people was, "Can I sit here?" It occurred to me that everyone was worrying about the new changes. Everyone was worrying about who to sit with. People are more alike than they are different.

This occurred to me for the first time when everyone was cheering at the women's soccer game. I had been intimidated at first, watching the Villa boys chant and yell and bang on drums, clad in kilts, togas and sombreros. I felt extremely small and underdressed, but I was getting pumped up for the game. Their excitement and laughter were contagious and I was soon swept up into the parade of people chanting and walking to the field.

In that moment, walking next to my roommate and a ton of other people I didn't know, I realized how alike we all are. As we chanted "Pilots 'til I die," I felt like a part of a community. That was the first moment that I felt like a real Pilot, not a visitor or a freshman, but a pilot.

As the orientation weekend drew to a close - after being silly and making a fool of myself, after making new friends and plenty mistakes, after asking for help and telling at least 100 people my major, I was finally ready for college.

To answer my biggest worry and maybe a worry a lot of freshmen have: Can I handle college? Yes, I can handle college; anyone can handle college - especially at the University of Portland.